Walter the Farting Dog

Ok, this sounds like something that would be right up my alley, but I didn't even know about it. Now it may become a major motion picture. Congrats to these guys from Fredericton, they will be striking it rich for sure. I guess they have already, the books are pretty popular.

And they say it isn't easy to write children's books? Come on, even Madonna has done it... So how about my ideas:

1. Freddy the Flatulent Feline


2. Iggy the Intoxicaded Iguana


3. Cory the constipated Cat

I am not giving them all away, keep your eyes peeled, coming to a bookstore (or movie theatre) near you!

The Amazing Race

Did anyone watch the Amazing Race last night? Since Charla and Mirna were eliminated I thought it was going to get boring. Was I ever wrong. Colin decided to lose it over $100 cab ride in Kilimanjaro and he is lucky he didn't get thrown in jail. Who the heck argues with the police in Kilimanjaro? I was really hoping they would toss his sorry butt in the can. He really treated Chrisite poorly but the worst part was how she was blaming herself later on. A few episodes back Mirna (or Charla, I get the names mixed up) went off on Colin and called him domineering and she called Christie submissive. I thought she was crazy for making these comments but it turns out she was right. On the previews for next weeks show it shows him going off again. Can you imagine if you were his mother watching that?

I can't believe I am this caught up in a reality show but it is really good. Too bad you have to be a U.S. citizen to apply.

Now I really feel out of shape...

When you were 9 years old how many push-ups could you do? Did you even want to do push-ups? Probably not, but this kid obviously is a little different. My arms hurt just from reading it.

What song are you listening to right now?

I always have my headphones on at work, I guess that's why I miss so many phone calls, wait a sec, nobody calls me anyway... ;-)

Anyway, I am just curious, so tell me what you are listening to right now...

Right now I am listening to Eric Clapton - Promises.

You ever drink too much?

I am sure we all have, you wake up in the morning feeling bad and you try to count how many drinks you actually consumed the night before. I am sure sometimes the count gets pretty high, but I think this takes the cake.

Rooting against America

Is it the right thing to do? I am not sure, but it's fun!

I have to say, I was giggling like a school girl while watching Puerto Rico pick the US apart in basketball yesterday. It has nothing to do with the individual, it's just that they are American. And when I read a second ago that Ian Thorpe won gold in the 200 m freestyle, and that American Michael Phelps (who some had projected to win 8 gold medals), only managed the bronze, I found myself smiling. Now this guy is only 19 years old and I certainly don't wish anything bad for him, but, I just don't want to see the Americans win all the time. It was also sweet to see South Africa take the 4 x 100 relay in swimming...

I am not Anti-american I am Canadian ;-)

And the winner is...

John Heffron

Reality TV

So there are a lot of "Reality" shows out right now and I was wondering what you all think of them... I can't claim to have seen them all and I know for sure I hate some of them (Big Brother), but I also think some of them are quite good, here is my top 5:

1. The Amazing Race


2. Survivor


3. Last Comic Standing


4. The Apprentice


5. The Surreal Life

Pretty sad commentary when you think about it but I have nothing else to say today. At least Last Comic Standing takes some real talent (I am pulling for Gary) and The Amazing Race is also based on a certain skill/determination level... As for the others, well, I guess they have a little bit but for the most part they are just popularity contests.

Lets try this again...

Not many responses to yesterday's post, but that's ok, Christine had a couple of funny ones there... I decided to start a new post with this one even though it could have been entered in with yesterdays... Anyway, courtesy of our buddy George W:

President Bush offered up a new entry for his catalog of "Bushisms" on Thursday, declaring that his administration will "never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people."

Do you really think he misspoke?

Here is the full article.

Save a horse, ride a cowboy...

For all of you who watch the World Series of Poker on ESPN, that is the name of the theme song, it is by a country duo called Big & Rich. I am way over my country music phase (thank God) but this is a catchy song, and it got me thinking about funny sayings. Why don't you all post some your favourite funny sayings or one-liners so we can all have a good laugh?

I will start off with this one, a quote from a British sports writer while following Colin Montgomerie during a round of The Open a few weeks ago. Apparently Monty had a little flatulence problem during the round, the reporter commented later on Colin's "Anal Trumpetry". Leave it to the Brits to make farts even funnier...

Time for Pete to rant...

I am Pissed off! I ordered a dvd from FutureShop, it was a great sale and free shipping, sweet deal. I got a call from UPS last week asking me where the house was, I said that no one was home, can you please deliver it to Valley Computers (This is where all my parcels go when I am not home) Anyway, I did not know that Valley Computers does not accept UPS parcels. I called and asked them where the parcel was and they said that they had to refuse it and that it went to the Sameday depot in Saint John. I called them and they said that it went out for re-delivery and it just so happened that Jillian was home sick that day. Fine I thought she will get it. Anyway, that was Wednesday (I think) and still no parcel. So I called UPS today and they say that since the parcel was refused it was sent back to the original location, which is MISSISSAUGA, FREAKIN' ONTARIO. Thanks for the call UPS! What can Brown do for me?? Brown can go and suck!

Ok, the dust has settled, but I am still mad. How can the guy think that I would want my parcel sent back to Ontario? I would have gone and met the damn truck if he had of called back...

Now I have to wait God knows how long to watch the zany antics of the worlds greatest hero, Notch Johnson. Isn't that a kick in the old Groinal Ball Sack?

The Straight Dope

Here is a great site where you can learn all kinds of useful information, you know, the kind of information that is useful for Trivial Pursuit, impressing friends, and being that know-it-all jerk who never shuts his pie hole...

The Straight Dope